Come...Spend Time with Me

“Come…spend time with me.” Have you ever heard your baby or your honey ask you that only to answer, give me a few minutes, maybe in a little while or I can’t right now because I have too much to do. A woman’s work is never done is an understatement. There is always laundry to do. Gotta find those lost socks the dryer seems to disappear. Dinner, dishes, floors, closets and don’t forget those dreaded windows. Throw in a full-time job, babies, schooling – regular or home and no wonder time is precious and a luxury.

But – that doesn’t stop those you love from asking, “Come…spend time with me”.

If you speak to someone who is terminally ill, all those chores, those important to dos take a back seat. They realize that what trumps all those things is to spend time with those they love and to spend time with God. It’s no longer an after-thought. It’s a priority. Those people understand that time is limited and their investment is to pour themselves into the ones they love, including and especially God. Dishes can be done later, house cleaning can be postponed and school can be skipped. Hugs become a norm, I love you cannot be repeated often enough.

Why is it that we adjust so readily when tragedy or illness strike to prioritize correctly? Perhaps it’s human nature or a woman’s nature to want to get things done and have all in order for a smoother life. But what happens when that interferes with what’s really important?

Children do not stop growing and they will eventually leave. Your most-valued relationship will provide what you put in. If you neglect it, you will lose it. People grow old and die or people can be here today and gone tomorrow. Where is your heart in all of this and will the mundane regular stuff really matter when all is said and done? 

Photography by Roz|2012

Many folks live with temporary or permanent guilt because they did not slow down enough to be present for their kids, be present for their spouses, be present for a friend. When Jesus told Martha that Mary chose the good part, he was pointing out that she responded to his deepest need and desire. “Come…spend time with me”. Although he loved that Martha was preparing a meal for him and appreciated that she was attending to all those he traveled with, he hoped she would come sit and spend time with him.

Sounds a little unfair? Well let’s think about this. Puerto Rican women have a hard time sitting when visitors are around and we like to cook a full meal, make sure everyone has coffee after dinner and wrap up with a clean kitchen. Although it is an admirable routine we have down, we miss out on quality time with our guest because the true reason for the visit was to spend time with each other beyond the 20-30 minutes at the table within the 3 hour visit. I can guarantee you if anyone at that table was terminal or if there was a crisis, dinner would be simpler, dishes and kitchen cleaning would wait, and there would be at least a 2 ½ hour spending time together moment.

I don’t think it’s bad to be a Martha. I am a Martha and would have probably done the same thing she did. I love to serve those who come to my home. I think, however, that as a Martha we have to become sensitive to God and those we love and learn to know when to stop when we hear…"come…spend time with me”. Everything else can wait.

(Story of Mary and Martha is in Luke 10.)