Queen Level Value

Your value is not defined by what others say or think about you. No one can impact you unless you give them the power to do so.

Your value should be so high in your pretty, little head that your norm should be the expectation of respect. It's not just lip service. It's behavior, it's treatment and it is the display of honor on queen level.

Anything less, devalues you. Your value is above rubies.

(Book cooking in the brain for 2016!)

Above Rubies

Your value is not defined by what others say or think about you. No one can impact you unless you give them the power to do so. Your value should be so high in your pretty little head that your norm should be the expectation of respect.

It's not just lip service. It's behavior, it's treatment and it is the display of honor on queen level. Anything less devalues you. Your value is above rubies. 

(Book cooking in the brain for 2016!)

Witness to Favor

Have you ever been a witness to favor?

What is favor you ask? It's preferential treatment from someone. It's done to you, not because you deserve it, but because you are loved. It's not based on what you do or don't do. It's based on grace.

What is grace you ask? It's a gift given out of love even though you did not deserve it. It encompasses forgiveness and restoration and reconciliation. All this describes how God loves.

There are good things that happen in your life that are unexplained, and I dare say they're actually kisses from heaven.

Others wonder how you are so blessed and have a great life and wonder what you are doing right. They are witnesses to God's favor in your life. It doesn't happen just because. It happens because you have relationship with the Father and they're seeing the harvest of blessings on your life through Christ Jesus.

When you become the focus of God's favor, it speaks volumes to those around you. It is the greatest way to share God's story in you and about you, without saying a word. That is Jesus they see.

This time, this era, your lifetime is such a great opportunity to show off God's love through you.

Watch your words and let people read the story of your life. Let them be a witness.

Don't Lose Hope

I look around and I see a world without hope from time to time. The news is filled with doom and gloom. It seems like society is taking steps backwards instead of forward. We hear parents say, I'm afraid of the world my kids will live in. We hear the upcoming generation say, I'm not sure I want to bring children into this world.

It can be easy to lose hope when you focus on all the negative around. It's a given that you will lose hope if your focus is on the bad in others, the bad in those closest to you, the bad in your job, the bad in your commute, the bad in the weather...get it?

There is plenty of good, but when your focus is on all the negative, your perspective becomes clouded and disjointed. You lose hope.

My kind of hope is the expectation of good, no matter how bad it's raining, no matter who's moody, no matter what is going on in the government, my job or my home. It's not a naive, I'm not aware kind of ladeeda thing, or I'm ignoring the fact that some stuff needs fixing. It is the decision not to let anything negative impact my freedom circle.

Expect good today!!!

Your Time Value

This is a new day. It's another opportunity to start over, to try to get it right, whatever right is. It's the chance to get certain things done.

Today, this moment, is where you can make a difference. You can't stay stuck in yesterday because it's in the past. There is no changing it. Tomorrow you can plan for but to live in it is just a dream. You make no impact.

Today is what you have. This moment is at your disposal. You lose the precious minutes of today as I write and you read. Your time, YOUR time is precious. How you invest it is important.

When you give anyone time, it says loudly you are ssssooo important to me. Time is your currency. Don't let anyone devalue it and don't let it slip through your fingers with idleness. Keep, maintain and increase your time value.

Live fully aware of your time and how you share it today.

The Lowes Date

Many women I know want or expect their dates with their husband to be a candle-lit dinner at a restaurant with small, round, white-clothed tables, soft music playing in the background and dimmed lights.

Although that's an ideal Hollywood picture setting, it's unrealistic for everyday dates. This is the hang up of quite a few women. If it's not all out, it's not a real, romantic date.

What I've learned over the years is that a date is a "mindset" and not just the "place". When you shift the mindset to what a date is, it actually nurtures the relationship.

What is the correct mind shift?

Each time my husband asked me to go somewhere with him without the kids, he was actually saying, I want to spend time with you. Here is where even I didn't get it in the past.

When Rich used to ask me to go to Lowe's, the first things that ran through my mind was...

1. Lowe's! Why would I want to go to a home improvement place?!

2. Of all places to ask me to, why a home improvement place?

3. Fun...this is what he considers fun?

4. You would think he would take me to a movie or dinner or something.

5. Grumble, Grumble, Grumble

Sounds familiar?

Togetherness

Okay here's what I've learned. When you first began to date, you were accommodating and flexible and went anywhere with that darling man because you just wanted to spend time with him. It didn't matter that you didn't like the place or activity, what was important to you was that you were together.

Women grow out of that mindset, for some insane reason (after marriage and especially after children).

Romance doesn't define togetherness. Togetherness is what ushers in romance. Doing things together is what deepens the relationship. So when you shift the focus to what he really wants (spending time with you), your attitude changes in the home improvement store.

When you're attitude improves (at the home improvement store), you begin to hear what he likes, dislikes, wants to buy and are pleasantly surprised that he is interested in your opinions. He may even start to ask you what you would like fixed or updated in the house! You get your wish list done without nagging, you are a happy woman, you want to love on him (don't forget sex is part of that too), he is thrilled with the loving and will invite you out to more diverse places, including that Hollywood-setting restaurant.

Ladies men are not complicated. If your husband asks, say yes. Do the Lowe's date, and do it happily. 

Cool of the Day

There’s something very peaceful about waking up to steady rainfall, window opened with a soft, cool breeze. It soothes the entry of the day. Eyes closed, the mind begins to wander, imagine and remember.

One thing that stands out in my mind are the countless walks I had with my dad as a young girl. Being the oldest, I was his buddy. If you know my dad, he LOVES to talk…and walk. Although we couldn’t afford to take expensive vacations, he made it a point to take us to all the places NY had to offer tourists. He took full advantage and made our trips adventurous, fun and of course educational. My dad’s trade of heart is teacher.

In my late teen years, my dad used to miss our walks and would leave me notes on the table that I would see some mornings asking that I spend time with him. Those notes became very important to me.

Those memories help me understand what it must have felt like being in the garden of Eden. Here it is in the cool of the day, in this case it was the end of the day, and God seeks out Adam and Eve for their walk. They all look forward to this time together because they want to tell each out about all that has transpired hours before. I can imagine that the conversation may have resembled one that may happen at dinner table.

Do you know what I saw today???

You know, Adam brought up this really great point…

What were you thinking when you created that thing?!

Everyone in that intimate party looked forward to each other’s company. I can even imagine Eve slipping her arm into God’s – as she walked with him and shared her heart. Why not? Didn’t he himself say that we are his children? I did it with my dad, still do when I walk and talk with him…why wouldn’t Eve?

It’s the cool of the day (in my neck of the woods) and my imagination has taken me into the place that reminded me how way cool it is that the God of the universe wants to spend time with me. That’s all he ever wanted. It was never about my do’s and don’ts or what I could do to earn his love. It was always about his just wanting to talk and walk with me, arm in arm.