When asked if you love someone, our instinctive reaction is to think about how someone makes us feel. We let memories that forged those feelings captivate our mind. We can actually smell their cologne, feel their last kiss and get all mushy inside. Although our initial thought was based on what we felt, we all get to a point where we understand and know that it’s more than that. It’s a verb. It is the constant action that gives validation to the words…I love you.
Author’s Note:
I encourage you to cultivate and invest into your relationship with God. When you become real with God, He can't help but become real with you.
Unfortunately the expression, “I love you” has come across as empty words for many women. They heard these precious words but were shown quite the opposite. Many have suffered neglect and emotional, verbal and/or physical abuse or were enablers to men who never grow up and are still boys. Regrettably, a lot of our gals have not learned their value and believe that they don’t deserve a man that should treat them like a queen.
What does it mean to be treated as a queen? It means waiting for a man that will treat you with respect and honor that will support and complement you as an individual. It doesn’t mean that when you do find that man, you claim the right to maintain your broom lady persona with the pointy hat. Our mentality has been ‘I will not get burned again’ and so all men ( the ones that live with us, the ones that are dating us, the ones that will date us, even the ones who are consider dating us) are subject to our wicked wrath.
Perhaps if we’d invest more of our love affair with God, a lot of us would not continue to feel this way. You see your love affair with God will determine the thermostat of your most intimate relationship.
So the question is do you love God? I mean do you really love God; not just lip service.
Let’s start with why it is important to a man that you love God. The top reason for a man is because he wants to be with someone that is not afraid to receive love and respects him. I can see some of you cringing at the word respect because you’re thinking ‘I don’t need another daddy’. Let’s define the word respect. It’s a feeling of admiration, thoughtfulness or esteem towards someone. I think that is doable don’t you?
So how can a woman meet a man’s need to give love and receive respect? Well here’s the answer.
The ‘Does She Love God’ Age-Old Theory
Girl has relationship with God because…
Girl responded to God’s love, then…
Girl grows to love God, and…
Girl understands God’s love so…
Girl craves to be more like God, then…
Girl lives to reflect God’s love, and wala…
Girl is able to respect the way God commanded.
Yes you read the last bullet right. You see in the bible it was very clear. God said to man love your lady but he said to us gals, respect your man. Why is that? For the most part, we don’t have a problem with loving, we’re emotional beings. The problem for most tainted women is to receive love and bestow respect to the man who wants to love them. There are many reasons for that, but the one that floats to the top of the list is trust. Quite simply, you do not trust. You do not trust enough to receive love, therefore, you cannot respect, admire, esteem…forget about being thoughtful. What about the need to earn trust? That’s a reasonable question in any relationship and can only be answered by you.
Does your primary relationship include God, love and trust?
You see when you love God, really love God, the hardest decision you will make it to trust Him. I’ve heard some women say, it’s not hard to trust God…He loves me no matter what. That is a fact that most know and acknowledge but they live however they like. Imagine being in a relationship saying you love someone, but you continue to do things that hurt your significant other. Is that really love?This is where a lot of us miss the mark. We say we love God but our DO doesn’t support it.
When we love God, we understand the importance of surrender. Surrender puts us in a place of trust. However, surrender is not possible unless there’s an intimate relationship. When there’s an intimate relationship, God can unearth all the crappy stuff that we call luggage. He can help us acknowledge the hurts so we can heal or find the help to heal. He releases us from the bondage of low self-esteem because he provides the affirmation, validation and value that we seek as women. He takes it a step further and helps us discover our purpose, is thrilled when we finally walk in our destiny and remains on the sidelines to cheer us on. I even believe (my opinion) that He smiles when we walk like His queens, confident and bold strutting in our black patent-leather stilettos. (Okay maybe minus the 6 inch heels for some of us.)
A woman that knows who she is doesn’t need a man to complete her but welcomes a man that adds or complements her. When you strive to become the woman that God wants you to be, you position yourself to receive your man’s love and you understand the importance and balance that respect brings in that intimate relationship. That is what you bring to the table.
You will never know the depth of you, the potential within you or your uniqueness on your own. I bet if you think about it, you’ve probably tried everything else and you still come up empty. You look in the mirror and you don’t like what you see.
Don’t lose heart, make a change and start today. Fall in love with the One who loves you unconditionally and wants the very best for you.
I encourage you to cultivate and invest into your relationship with God. When you become real with God, He can't help but become real with you.
